Its not easy to make a living and/or support a family as an independent artist, especially from Montana. There is a lot of noise out there today that makes it difficult no matter where you are from. I just wanted to THANK YOU all for being a part of a dream that I had when I was 12 years old. I found my mom’s old acoustic and said “This is what I am going to do”. I haven’t given myself any back up plans. And depending on who you talk to, that was either kind of wise or extremely foolish.
I have new music coming soon. I have spent way too much time on this next batch of music. hundreds of hours. Its probably the most personally insightful thing I’ve done. Working on them have been sort of a daily letter to myself reminding me who I am, where I’ve been and where I am going. They’ve helped steer me in a new/old direction. I have been living pretty fearfully. I have been scared most of my life and its caused me to care about some people’s opinions that I shouldn’t have. It’s made me consider voices that didn’t consider me. Its caused a lot of knee jerk reactions that led me down dead end roads.
All along I have starved for love. We all do. And we all try to do the math as to how to get it. I’ve adopted a common formula. I find someone who has what I want. I compare and contrast and decide that if I imitate them, I will get what they have. But it doesn’t work that way. As a musician it is hard not to get caught up in equating record sales and concert attendance with how loved I am. The belief is this: the more recognition I receive, the more valuable my life and work is. It’s a lie though. In fact I am convinced chasing acclaim is the path to madness. i have felt pretty crazy at times. But here is what I have realized. People will never love me enough. They will never appreciate my music enough. That is not to say there aren’t those who will try. It’s to say, my desperate need for love outweighs anything that you can give me. Maybe to some that’s a flaw. But I am considering it a head start.
Its simple. Accepting myself for who I am today and not what I think I should be; that’s all I can do and its what I should do. I was made to be me. you were made to be you. why try to be anything else? I have a long ways to go, both in living without fear and finding an audience with my music, LOL. But I’m gonna make it.
I am hopefully expectant that the new music will find its audience and grateful for my friends and fam that have helped push this as far as its gone. you guys are the #6Foot6Supporters #DowlersWeirdos